Saturday, February 26, 2011

Why can’t men …

Weekend Today, February 26 - 27, 2011, Column, Page T3 (The Fairer Text)
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By Georgina Chang, georginac@mediacorp.com.sg, 05:55 AM Feb 26, 2011



PHOTO: Contemplating the deep and complex mystery that is man.
Why can’t men check out other women discreetly when they’re with us ... when your girl is next to you, show her a little respect.

Artwork by FAIZAL, Copyright © MediaCorp Press Ltd

http://imcmsimages.mediacorp.sg/cmsfileserver/showimageCC.aspx?450&447&f=2163&img=2163_346466.jpg&h=450&w=447
Weekend Today, February 26 - 27, 2011, Column, Page T3 (The Fairer Text)





PHOTO: Georgina Chang
The writer is the senior creative director of 987FM and Lush 99.5.

Weekend Today, February 26 - 27, 2011, Column, Page T3 (The Fairer Text)



I LOVE the company of men - I just don't understand why they do the things they do sometimes. Or why they don't do the things they could do. You know, simple things that would make us women happier - but are never done.

For example, why can't men just be romantic, for no reason? Up the romance factor not only on obligatory special occasions like birthdays. And not only because they want nookie, or because they're guilty about an indiscretion.

Instead of waiting for an anniversary, why not take us to a cosy restaurant on a random Tuesday, surprise us with our favourite chocolates, or play a Maxwell CD and simply slow dance with us? Just be romantic and sweet because you're grateful your girl got with a chump like you.



PHOTO: Romantic and Sweet


Why can't men talk about their feelings? Or about ours.

Bring it up and they look startled, and immediately start squirming away. If we persist, they try to change the subject, kiss you to shut you up, or suddenly have an urgent errand/phone call/physical ailment.

Most of the time, they prefer to keep talk restricted to the areas of sports and sex. I do enjoy these conversations, but their eyes glaze over when I start to share my feelings, or about deeper metaphysical topics.



PHOTO: Excerpts from, "A New Earth... Awakening to Your Life's Purpose" by Eckhart Tolle...
Seeing beauty in a flower could awaken humans, however briefly, to the beauty that is an essential part of their own innermost being, their true nature. The first recognition of beauty was one of the most significant events in the evolution of human consciousness. The feelings of joy and love are intrinsically connected to that recognition.

http://anecdotes.typepad.com/photos/uncategorized/2008/02/21/rose1.jpg
http://anecdotes.typepad.com/anecdotes_antidotes_and_a/2008/02/red-red-roses.html


You might not have any interest in how Eckhart Toile's book A New Earth changed my life, but all you need to know is that it's important to me. Please choose to be present for that moment and just listen, and nod at the right times so we know that you're listening, that you're into our minds as well as our bodies.

Why can't guys just be friends first? If they sense they're not going to get anything out of it, the attention and development of the relationship starts to wane.



PHOTO: Start to care for someone and accept each other's flaws and ugliness, that's a great foundation for both friends and lovers.
http://fergalcasey.files.wordpress.com/2009/12/watchmenniteowlsilspectreii.jpg?w=516&h=330
http://fergalcasey.wordpress.com/page/7/


Sometimes, girls want to develop a stronger bond of trust and respect first. If we admire you, we'll develop feelings that could lead to a whole lot more.

Anyway, if you start to care for someone and accept each other's flaws and ugliness, that's a great foundation for both friends and lovers.

Why can't men check out other women discreetly when they're with us? I understand the open-mouth gawking when you're with your Neanderthal mates, but when your girl is next to you, show her a little respect.

There's really no need to stare blatantly - and definitely no need to let the other woman catch you staring.

That's disparaging to us. You're saying: "The chick with me is chopped liver."

Instead, try a little subtlety. Or get your woman to look, too. The couple who ogles together stays together, right? But remember that after we stop looking, you have to as well. In fact, it's better for your welfare if you actually tear your eyes away before we do.



PHOTO: Sweet Girl
http://static.fashion4us.com/images/fashion/detail/1mil/1hun/6ten/9000/58634a.jpg
http://fashion4us.com/wholesale-fashion-detail.action?id=58634


And when caught checking out another woman, why can't guys just admit it instead of vehemently (strongly) denying it and become defensive and angry? Dudes, just say: "Yes, I was looking. Sorry, Baby. You're the most beautiful woman to me." Jewellery accompaniment could hasten the healing process.

Why can't men be faithful? Yes, we know it strokes your ego when other ladies find you attractive, but a little restraint won't kill you.

Please decide whether those 15 seconds of gratification is more important than hurting your woman, and losing your children and life as you know it.

Why can't men confess that they were, in fact, unfaithful? Guys, we're not dumb. A woman's instinct is usually correct (unless the instincts belong to a crazy, insecure and possessive woman who thinks her man is cheating on her the moment he's out of her sight) but we usually turn an oblivious eye to it, hoping that he'll come to his senses and realise that we're the only woman he'll ever need.



PHOTO: When caught red handed, the victim seldom gets the confession she wants
http://advice.lovedetour.com/wp-content/uploads/Cheater.jpg
http://advice.lovedetour.com/mmasters/the-cheating-gene-who-does-it-and-why.html


When caught red handed, the victim seldom gets the confession she wants, like, "Yes, I've been cheating on you with Lola, the new marketing girl." Or the closure they need: "Yes I cheated on you because I'm a sex addict and you've put on 10kg."

Guys, if you're guilty and are confronted, please choose to come clean. It doesn't make it hurt any less, but we'll have more respect for you for being a man about it.

I've been told that men deny it to the very end (even when she's holding up someone else's thong she found under the bed) because they want to avoid the inevitable hysterical crying, followed by her friends and family spitting on you. But since you chose to cheat, man up and deal with it. Then move on and don't do it again.


PHOTO: Help us help you, boys. It's for the greater good. No more stray droplets on and around the throne.
http://uppix.net/7/d/9/79ccb153266c0a62a09d38084be45tt.jpg
http://forums.blueline.ca/viewtopic.php?f=28&t=23424&start=180


And, finally, why can't men pee sitting down?

I mean, for you, it would be more comfortable - why stand when you can sit and relax? And for us, no more stray droplets on and around the throne. It's a win-win situation.

Help us help you, boys. It's for the greater good.

By Georgina Chang, georginac@mediacorp.com.sg, 05:55 AM Feb 26, 2011
The writer is the senior creative director of 987FM and Lush 99.5.


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